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T O P I C R E V I E WAenIt looks I have a strong 12th influence composite with a certain Virgo man. The first thing that comes to mind is a secret love-affair, but things are not that simple. Lot of people assumed we were lovers years ago, when we were actually just good friends. Now we have become lovers and I doubt anyone suspects it. He is someone who has managed to stay in my life almost consistently for years. We've always had mutual friends or colleagues, etc. Have enjoyed together (dark & macabre & acid) sense of humour, good food (we both like cooking), wine discussions on everything, etc. Due to the circumstances there have been fewer connective people and we have found that we actually like to spend time with just two of us. time together feels very warm and good & wee-bit too cosy. I don't think I feel that comfortable with anyone else. Which is quite a compliment. And yet I feel that this relationship is more like running for safety than *real thing*.Any comments would be REALLY very much appreciated.AensthenriWow look at all that Scorpio, Sun, Moon, Merc and Venus in Scorpio in the composite!No wonder you like to cook together and drink wine. There is a fascination between you two, possibly strong sex appeal, but there could be a controlling tendency in one of you, a desire to view the other as a love object, someone to cuddle and spend time with away from everyone.Scorpio is not a sign that likes to party or be light hearted so you have to expect to be bonded like super glue.Not a lot of earth here, only Jupiter in Capricorn, so there is the sense of humour. You like that you know what to expect from the other, and humour is important. Money may be a problem.Why do you feel it's an escape? For him or for you? And what from? Other people or a specific condition in your life?How are mutual finances?NatashaTaurusAenThank you Natasha it was helpful.I'm not good with words, but I try to explain what I meant by escape. He has had some complicated relationships, which I don't think he has healed from. I'm on the other hand have been struggling with depression for few years and only recently have started to feel as if coming back into air again. Sort of looking around and seeing what has changed around me in the meanwhile and finding out what I have become. Like the last bit immensly. Does that make sense?Speaking of finances. He has a good business sense and streak for luxury & comfort. I like comfort too, but I can manage without as well. Much better than he can.sthenriMaybe you are not ready for an intimate relationship, or maybe you are. It's normal to be at a crossroads right now, and you do have a lot on your plate. There is another option, you could pull back and put the relationship on hold for a month, and analyze.How do you feel about being with him physically?Does he dominate you in any way emotionally?I am happy to hear you are feeling well, health really is everything isn't it?Personal question:Was he the initiator of the physical relationship or were you? And how do you feel about that?NatashaAenWow, that was quick! quote: .... you do have a lot on your plate.Astrologically speaking or ...?True anyway! quote:There is another option, you could pull back and put the relationship on hold for a month, and analyze.It will happen anyway. He'll be away for a month at least due to his work. Gives us time to think. quote:How do you feel about being with him physically?Does he dominate you in any way emotionally?I feel comfortable and safe with him. Cosy & protected were the first words to come to mind. quote:I am happy to hear you are feeling well, health really is everything isn't it?Yes, it certainly is! quote:Personal question:Was he the initiator of the physical relationship or were you? And how do you feel about that?I think it was him. *searching in memory files* Yes, it was. Verrrry subtle. And I like it. sthenriGood, it sounds like he isn't pushy in anyway, as long as you realize that all that Scorpio means an intense protected from the outside world relationship you two will be happy. Remember that it's a partnership, stay equals.I think when you say he has complicated relationships you are saying you are worried that he will identify these women in you, and that way you will not be able to be yourself, as strong as you want to be. Right now you are just getting back on your feet in terms of redefining yourself.Emotionally he hangs on to things, and he needs to let go of his past, you can't help him there. That may worry you subconciously. Some kind of therapy for him is essential since those were his relationships, an extension of his life, and he has to deal with them. Don't be his psychologist, and tell him you won't be if he gets too deep into his past when you are together. He needs to feel this is brand new, because in essence, you haven't been to this level before.That will make you feel more like he's really in the here and now.Earth signs need to feel happy about being themselves, in their self, and that means feeling their partner is truly in the here and now. As long as he makes more of an effort to eliminate past relationships from his mind, and you do not encourage him to be sentimental, you will be happy. But do not allow him to remember outloud. Nobody is that strong.Just try it,NatashaTaurusAen quote:Earth signs need to feel happy about being themselves, in their self, and that means feeling their partner is truly in the here and now.So true! Thank you so much for your help!YinNatasha, what you said about earth signs is so true about me as well. And I'm a Sag
He is someone who has managed to stay in my life almost consistently for years. We've always had mutual friends or colleagues, etc. Have enjoyed together (dark & macabre & acid) sense of humour, good food (we both like cooking), wine discussions on everything, etc. Due to the circumstances there have been fewer connective people and we have found that we actually like to spend time with just two of us.
time together feels very warm and good & wee-bit too cosy. I don't think I feel that comfortable with anyone else. Which is quite a compliment. And yet I feel that this relationship is more like running for safety than *real thing*.
Any comments would be REALLY very much appreciated.
Aen
No wonder you like to cook together and drink wine. There is a fascination between you two, possibly strong sex appeal, but there could be a controlling tendency in one of you, a desire to view the other as a love object, someone to cuddle and spend time with away from everyone.
Scorpio is not a sign that likes to party or be light hearted so you have to expect to be bonded like super glue.Not a lot of earth here, only Jupiter in Capricorn, so there is the sense of humour. You like that you know what to expect from the other, and humour is important. Money may be a problem.
Why do you feel it's an escape? For him or for you? And what from? Other people or a specific condition in your life?
How are mutual finances?
NatashaTaurus
I'm not good with words, but I try to explain what I meant by escape. He has had some complicated relationships, which I don't think he has healed from.
I'm on the other hand have been struggling with depression for few years and only recently have started to feel as if coming back into air again. Sort of looking around and seeing what has changed around me in the meanwhile and finding out what I have become. Like the last bit immensly.
Does that make sense?
Speaking of finances. He has a good business sense and streak for luxury & comfort. I like comfort too, but I can manage without as well. Much better than he can.
How do you feel about being with him physically?Does he dominate you in any way emotionally?I am happy to hear you are feeling well, health really is everything isn't it?
Personal question:Was he the initiator of the physical relationship or were you? And how do you feel about that?
Natasha
quote: .... you do have a lot on your plate.
Astrologically speaking or ...?True anyway!
quote:There is another option, you could pull back and put the relationship on hold for a month, and analyze.
It will happen anyway. He'll be away for a month at least due to his work. Gives us time to think.
quote:How do you feel about being with him physically?Does he dominate you in any way emotionally?
I feel comfortable and safe with him. Cosy & protected were the first words to come to mind.
quote:I am happy to hear you are feeling well, health really is everything isn't it?
Yes, it certainly is!
quote:Personal question:Was he the initiator of the physical relationship or were you? And how do you feel about that?
I think it was him. *searching in memory files* Yes, it was. Verrrry subtle. And I like it.
I think when you say he has complicated relationships you are saying you are worried that he will identify these women in you, and that way you will not be able to be yourself, as strong as you want to be. Right now you are just getting back on your feet in terms of redefining yourself.
Emotionally he hangs on to things, and he needs to let go of his past, you can't help him there. That may worry you subconciously. Some kind of therapy for him is essential since those were his relationships, an extension of his life, and he has to deal with them. Don't be his psychologist, and tell him you won't be if he gets too deep into his past when you are together. He needs to feel this is brand new, because in essence, you haven't been to this level before.
That will make you feel more like he's really in the here and now.
Earth signs need to feel happy about being themselves, in their self, and that means feeling their partner is truly in the here and now. As long as he makes more of an effort to eliminate past relationships from his mind, and you do not encourage him to be sentimental, you will be happy. But do not allow him to remember outloud. Nobody is that strong.
Just try it,
quote:Earth signs need to feel happy about being themselves, in their self, and that means feeling their partner is truly in the here and now.
So true!
Thank you so much for your help!
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